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46. PRINCE UTTARA
UTTARA, the son of Virata, set off with
enthusiasm from the city in his chariot
with Brihannala as his charioteer and
commanded the latter to drive quickly to
the place where the Kauravas had rounded
up the cows.
Willingly, the horses were put to their best
speed. And presently the Kaurava army
was sighted, at first a gleaming, line,
enveloped in a cloud of dust that seemed
to go up to the skies.
Going nearer, Uttara saw the great army
drew in battle by Bhishma, Drona, Kripa,
Duryodhana and Karna. At that sight, his
courage, which had been gradually drying
up during the rapid rush to the field, was
quite gone. His mouth went dry and his
hair stood on end.
His limbs were all in a tremble. He shut
his eyes with both his hands to keep out
the fearsome sight. He said:"How can I,
single-handed, attack an army? I have no
troops, since the king, my father, has
taken all available forces, leaving the city
unprotected. It is absurd to think that one
man can alone fight a well-equipped
army, led by world-renowned warrior! Oh
Brihannala, turn back the chariot."
Brihannala laughed and said: "O prince,
you started from the city, full of fierce
determination and the ladies expect great
things of you. The citizens also have put
their trust in you. Sairandhri praised me
and I have come at your request. If we
return without recovering the cows, we
shall become the laughing-stock of all. I
will not turn back the chariot. Let us stand
firm and fight. Have no fear." With these
words Brihannala began to drive the
chariot towards the enemy and they
approached quite close to them.
Uttara's distress was pitiable. He said in a
quaking voice: "I cannot do it, I simply
cannot. Let the Kauravas march off with
the cows and if the women laugh, let
them. I do not care. What sense is there in
fighting people who are immeasurably
stronger than we fight? Do not be a fool!
Turn back the chariot. Otherwise, I shall
jump out and walk back." With these
words Uttara cast off his bows and
arrows, got down from the chariot and
began to fly towards the city, mad with
panic.
This should not be taken as something that
has never happened in life. Nor is Uttara's
panic during his first battle, by any means,
singular.
Fear is a strong instinctive feeling, though
it can be overcome by will-power or
strong motives like love, shame or hate, or
more usually, by discipline.
Even men who have afterwards
distinguished themselves by heroic deeds
have confessed to having felt something
like panic fear, the first time they came
under fire. Uttara was by no means an
exceptional coward, for he fought and fell
gauntly at Kurukshetra.
Arjuna pursued the running prince,
shouting to him to stop and behave like a
Kshatriya. The braided hair of the
charioteer began to dance and his clothes
began to wave as he ran in pursuit of
Uttara. The prince fled hither and thither,
trying to dodge the hands that would stop
him.
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