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57. ATTACHMENT AND DUTY
I have eaten
the salt of Dhritarashtra's sons, won their
confidence as their champion and enjoyed
all the consideration and kindness they
showed me. And now you want me, when
the battle is about to be joined, to be
untrue to my salt and go over to the
Pandavas. The sons of Dhritarashtra look
on me as the ark, which will enable them
to cross the deluge of war. I have myself
urged them into this war. How can I now
desert them? Could there be blacker
treachery and baser ingratitude? What in
life, or beyond it, would be worth a price
like that? Mother dear, I must discharge
my debt, aye, with life, if necessary;
otherwise, I shall be no better than a
common thief purloining my food all
these years. I shall surely use all my
followers against your sons in this coming
war. I cannot deceive you. Please forgive
me."
"But yet," continued he, "I cannot have
my mother plead completely in vain. Part
with Arjuna to me. Either he or myself
must die in this war. I will not kill your
other sons, whatever they may do unto
me. Mother of warrior sons, you will still
have five sons. Either I or Arjuna will
survive this war. And with the other four
sons, you will still have five".
When Kunti heard her first-born speak
thus firmly, adhering to the kshatriya
code, her heart was full of tumultuous and
contrary feelings and, without trusting
herself to speak. She embraced him and
departed in silence.
"Who can go against what has been
ordained?" she thought. "He has, at least,
offered not to harm four of my sons. That
is enough. May God bless him," and she
returned home.
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